Month: February 2019

Gardening: The escape from my thoughts

Growing up with anxiety disorders, it was a rare occasion for me to find peace in my life.  No matter where I went or what I did, my thoughts would follow and taunt me.  However, being in the garden was the one consistent place I could retreat to and experience peace in my life.

My first panic attack that I can remember was when I was five years old.  It was probably more memorable as it resulted in my arms crashing through a glass door.  The kind of experience a young child would not forget.

To explain what a panic attack is, the best definition I can think of is “fear beyond fear”.  A panic attack is the greatest amount of fear that a person can experience in any given moment.

During most of my younger years my anxiety disorders mainly manifested as generalized anxiety.  Which essentially consisted of being in a heightened state of nervousness and worry, with a haze of fear cast over just about every thought I had and influencing almost every experience I was part of.

On the property that I grew up on there was always a vegetable garden.  Years earlier my grandfather had what could be considered a small farm on this very property.  He raised rabbits and chickens, grew crops and had a variety of fruit trees.  He loved his fruit trees.

Unfortunately, he passed away when I was quite young.  But the legacy that he left would certainly play a huge role in my life in many ways.

Since I was a young boy, every spring my mother and I would venture out into the yard to plant a vegetable garden.  I would be responsible for turning the dirt and then one by one plant the seedlings ever so gently.  Followed by the daily chores of weeding, watering and nurturing the little seedlings all the way through till harvest.

Later, as I became older, I realized that while out in the garden I did not have higher levels of anxiety.  Many times, in fact, while in the garden it felt as if my anxiety had disappeared altogether.  I did not understand why or how that could be, but it certainly was a welcome reprieve from my suffering.  More so in my later teens when my anxiety disorders had escalated and turned into phobias, and panic disorder was beginning to set in.

Since learning the recovery process, what I found out is that all anxiety lives in the future.  You see all anxiety, regardless of the specific cause or fear, begins with a single thought; a “what if” thought that is projected to a specific situation sometime in the future.

Recovery from anxiety disorders is essentially being able to “look away” from our fear and change our focus away from the “what if” thoughts to something that is not frightening to us.

This is what was happening to me while I was in the garden; my attention was taken away from my “what if” thoughts and I was focused on the plants I was caring for.  This allowed my levels of anxiety to become lower, and in many cases disappear completely for short periods of time.

In order to create full recovery, I used behavior modification to create a new emotional response to my specific triggers.  With this approach, we condition ourselves to be able to look away from our fear and not believe the “what if” thoughts that cause higher levels of anxiety.  Essentially being able to manage our thoughts and therefore stabilizing our emotional state.

Looking back over the years, there were certainly some very dark days in my life.  But the one constant joy that I had was being in the garden.

Some people say everything happens for a reason, I don’t know if I can completely agree with that.  However, when I consider my own journey, its difficult for me to dispute that statement.  Obviously, the person I am today is a culmination of all my experiences.  And the argument can be made that all those experiences happened for a reason.

Even now, after creating full recovery from anxiety disorders and living an unrestricted life; each spring I find myself out in the garden, turning dirt.

Currently I have devoted my efforts to helping other people create recovery for themselves.  Ten years ago, I completed my certification training within the program where I created recovery myself.  After being employed by the treatment center for several years running anxiety & phobia specific workshops and a weekly support group, I went on my own to spread the program through varies methods.  Recently I’ve created an online system that includes a video series, podcast, community forum and a blog; all in effort to help reach others that are in need of support & guidance.  http://www.anxietypath.com

I thank the people behind the Gardening For Disabled charity for giving me this opportunity to share my story.

Andrew Fisher Tomlin

The power of a day in the garden

I’m not particularly nostalgic and I often feel that many of my childhood memories have come from the tales my sister tells of what I got up to but I do have a few very clear memories that, I think, put me on the path to where I am today.

Those memories are very clearly of helping my Dad in one of his three allotment plots that we got to in a 5-minute bike ride. Often on a Sunday morning when a good roast was calling we’d cycle up to the allotment where Dad was already there working. We’d help him dig up potatoes which were like treasure, pull up carrots and pick runner beans. Once we got older we were allowed to pick fruit for Chivers Farms in the village during the summer holidays. And of course there was a garden at home that my Mum tended too with an apple tree for climbing and plum trees around the corner to harvest for free.

I often think that my passion for gardening comes from not just my childhood but also that I like my food and my Mum taught me to cook. It’s as important a skill as gardening and perhaps these days we could all take a lesson from this. And today even though my mortgage is paid from working in gardens I still enjoy a day in my own garden.

In our business we design community gardens for vision impairment, for dementia and with young people, a huge range of ages and abilities. I see the power that both active gardening and passive enjoyment of a garden brings. When I get home and go out for half an hour to do some gardening, and then find it’s three hours later and its gone dark, when I put my feet up and look at what I’ve achieved I still get as big a buzz out of a garden as I did digging up the treasure of potatoes all those years ago.

Quentin Stark is the Head Gardener at Hole Park Gardens, Kent http://www.holepark.com

He is also the Plant Doctor for Plant Fairs Roadshow http://www.plant-fairs.co.uk

There is a Snowdrop and Plant Fair Roadshow on Sunday 10th February 2019 at Hole Park from 11am until 3 pm

One of my Favourite Plants

There are over twenty species of Cyclamen, growing across Southern Europe, West Asia and Northern Africa.

I was introduced to the tender florist Cyclamen persicum as a young boy by my mother. It wasn’t until I was working at Savill Gardens I met the charming hardy species in the woodland garden. I was lucky to move to my current job which was five minutes from the former specialist Cyclamen nursery Tile Barn. The nearest thing to Cyclamen heaven.

It is some of these hardy species that I want to mention next.

Cyclamen repandum

Cyclamen repandum one of the lesser known species and is definitely a woodland plant, as its foliage is less leathery than its cousins Cyclamen hederifolium and C. coum. Its leaves have a well-defined hastate pattern outlined in silver. The foliage comes up in spring with the arrival of warmer days to come, followed soon by the long elegant slightly twisting magenta petals.

Cyclamen  purpurescens

This Cyclamen is more of a challenge to grow well out in the garden, as it prefers a continental climate. It is worth trying by planting deeply in a humus shady spot, as this species flowers from June to October with pale pink to carmine and rarely white flowers with the most delightful sweet scent like violets, the best scent of any Cyclamen. It is in leaf almost all year around with heart to kidney shaped leaves that vary in colour from glossy green to entirely pewter coloured, usually has a hastate pattern highlighted in cream, silver or pewter

Cyclamen hederifolium

To me the end of hazy days of summer and the coming mellow fruitfulness of Autumn is signified with the appearance with the first blooms of the most accommodating and long-lived Cyclamen species.

Cyclamen hederifolium is one of the most common species grown, with its butterfly-like blooms that come in shades of rose-pink or white before the leaves, make their appearance. The foliage gives an added bonus to the beauty and another reason to grow these small hardy plants. These leathery leaves with hastate mark in the centre of the leaf, and marbled with shades of green, pewter and silver give rise to almost limitless patterns.

These pictures show the bank opposite my back door, on which Cyclamen hederifolium has appeared over the last 18 years and I’ve not planted one of them, so how did they come to be there?

The seeds of Cyclamen have a sweet coating on them and this is desirable to mice and ants. They collected the seeds from plants in other parts of my garden removed the sweet coating and left the seeds in their runs which seems to be a great place for germination.

Cyclamen coum

Cyclamen coum arrives in winter it’s kidney shaped leaves fully expanded. These leaves like the autumn flowering C. hederifolium have a central hastate marking and can be as variable. The flowers are dumpy compared to other species of Cyclamen, I think this gives them a charm of their own. This delightful species starts to flower in December and continues well into February, with a range of colour from pure white through hints and shades of pink to carmine. This is my favourite species as it gives the most welcome colour in the depth of winter.

To find out more about these wonderful charming plants, the book by Christopher Grey-Wilson, Cyclamen A guide for gardeners, horticulturists and botanists. It has everything you need to know about growing Cyclamen.

The Cyclamen society is great to group to join to further your knowledge and increase your plants through their seed scheme.

‘I know of no other genus whose plants flower out of doors every day of the year. I know of no other genus with one or more species coming into bloom or growth, peaking or going dormant at every season.’ Nancy Goodwin

Ian W. Scroggy HNDH

Ian Scroggy works with his parents running Bali-Hai Mail Order Nursery.

SLUGS NO MORE!!!!

Bali-Hai Mail Order Nursery http://www.mailorderplants4me.com